hope

Theres always that wee bit of hope lingering down the stream of despair. That faint light which might just blaze upon that slight breeze. But all seems to be lost in the hollow darkness just like that of a black hole. Theres expectations or hope about something that drives a person to the strech of his mortal stay in this world. Fresh from a so-so interview, waking to a clear and warm morning of spring. A kick, out of the blue about the result of the interview drived all that laziness to the backseat. An array of rejections in numerous companies leaves one heartbroken and the future now dwells on the verdict that is on the agenda this day. the anxiety just blurred the whole world around me it dimmed the words, the sight, the sober chirping of birds, the dancing leaves and even the lectures of our class. Never was so much concerned about the result of recruitment but, the expectations of friends and their confidence on me just accentuated my anxiety and that crave to excel. The busy gait of our placement coordinator along the corridor through the scuttling crowd, his mobile as usual seemed stuck to his ears. There was that hint of a news, that irrefutable negative vibe about his swagger. Still there was that hope against hope, i tried to converge my thoughts to whatever good things that happened during the interview but all those efforts became victim of mockery in the face of that unbearable news 'you are not selected for the company'.a lump in the throat, frown on the face symbolyzing the steep downfall from thereon, the whole noise around me just went mute. my mind strayed all around and about the thought that i have let down everyone, specially my parents and my friends. I felt like a failure, the first time i realised how hard can one get hit by life specially after 10 odd rejections. No other concern except that same question, relentlessly pounding my skull 'what lacks in me, why im not as better as others?'. Still i dare to stand up and brace myself again for the final battle and yet again HOPE for the best.

A memoir

It was a breezy morning with scattered drops of rain embedded in the air.Uh...sorry, It was afternoon! Once again I slept through the whole morning. As I hung the toothbrush in my mouth and was dragging my feet along the slippery corridor floor a gust of wind blew across swaying my hair and waking me from whatever remnants of hangover i was having. The lunch in the mess was as usual too pathetic to even comment upon. Again as I was dragging myself to my room i got a call blaring 'gupchup party in the evening'. The excitement swept through my whole body instantly and drove the whole monotony of the weekend out of me. The longstanding separation form my school friends were all to be submerged in the brimming excitement like that of a first time lover. We met each other at sector-5 in the evening and were exchanging admiration, excitement along with the usual greetings when rain gods thought to spoil the fun and suddenly expectorated the heavy shower from its constraints. The splatter of rains all around and its noise distracted me a bit but the ripping of one of our friend for all the muscle he had put on, brought my focus back.

The heavy downpour settled to a slight drizzle, sighting this opportunity we rode through the glistening road to 'cloud 9' bar. The atmosphere inside was indeed so relaxing with dim lights spotted by bright red cigarette ends and people probably sharing their day's distress over a bottle of Johnnie walker. However we were to celebrate our reunion and each of us scuttled in different directions to search for a vacant cabin. Now one fellow did notice an empty cabin and we all sprung in quickly to scrutinize the discovery. I noticed a reserved token over the table and made an announcement of our failure. One of our friends however asked for the waiter and enquired 'who has reserved this cabin?’ The waiter probably after some search down his memory lane replied 'I don’t remember!’ I instantly whispered to the protagonist fellow 'dude does it matter? The waiter doesn’t know whether any other person booked this place or it was us!' ignoring the thoughtful look at the waiters face. After that it wasn’t much hard to convince him and we made ourselves comfortable on the cozy couch. The hookahs being set up, the drinks and the starters being ordered, we begin our journey through the old stories, our vivid and hilarious experiences and drowned ourselves in the engrossing nostalgia. Along with the drinks I poured out all the stress and bland way of life out and drank in all the joy of the moment. The emphatic demeanor of our expressions caught attention of a few people and also the manager so he came to intervene our immortal moment. His vague words were of no avail to our customized ears as if we had descended into a world of our own. Going by the saying that the truest feelings of the heart oozes out after a peg, one fellow called his girlfriend over the phone to bargain a few extra kisses in their next meeting.

The feeling of being high dominated our emotions and swept us into the delight which I never had experienced in my life. However the end wasn’t that pleasing with some feeling queasy and having a debacle with whatever they had gorged, in their unconsciousness and letting out the stuffs in a scurry. While driving back home I felt happy that his abrupt planning of events eventually turned out to one of the most cherished moments of my life.